School of Spiritual Deepening (YWAM Seamill)

In October, I went to YWAM Seamill. It was a dream come through. Had always been drawn to revival and the YWAM school, with its emphasis on the Father's Heart, hearing the voice of God, the fear of the Lord, and missions. But the 5-month Discipleship Training School has always been too much of a commitment and time off from work. Then, there is the question of which YWAM school to go to. With so many to choose from in the different nations, my heart has inclined for some reason to either Scotland (land of the warriors), or Herrnhut (land of the Moravians, and 24/7 prayer). But Scotland seemed more intimate, more homely. So when the Lord opened the door for me to go recently, to attend the two-week School of Spiritual Deepening, I was so excited! Nervous and excited, because when it's been a lifelong dream, there is so much expectation wrapped in it. Would it be as what I thought it was? Or would it be a letdown?

Having completed the school, I must say that it was such a tremendous blessing! I loved every bit of it -

1. The YWAM Seamill community. Am sure the community changes all the time, with people coming and going, but there is such a wonderful warm air about the place. There is a commitment to seeking the Father's heart, whether through Monday base worship, or praying for the nations (every Thursday). Interestingly, in my time there, there was quite a number of Americans, Germans, etc. Not many Scots!

2. The old building that is the base. This stately house is massive -- and can apparently sleep 100 people at a time. It was built more than a century ago, and was a convalescence home for miners, being so close to the Firth of Clyde and sea-air. The doors are heavy in this place! I loved the space, and the common rooms like the lounge and our classroom. There is a library here stocked with hundreds of Christian books, which is so precious!

3. The surroundings and the neighbourhood. Just 5 minutes across the road is the Firth of Clyde -- my goodness, this seascape is raw, natural, vast beauty. As I walked one day down the seashore, with my eye looking as far as could be, the verse that came to mind was "How precious to me are your thoughts, Lord. How vast is the sum of them. Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand." (Psalm 139) The vastness of the Firth of Clyde evokes that emotion! And then, on the backside of the school, just 2 minutes away, is such a picturesque glen. Because I was there in autumn, was treated to such beautiful autumnal colours walking through the glen to the village. It was just such a treat!

4. The School of Spiritual Deepening itself. Conducted by Shawna and Greg Hayes, the school was such a precious time for me, of being reminded about cultivating the inner life, so Christ is fully formed in us. We learnt so much over the 10 days about different disciplines to cultivate in our lives, whether it is eating the word through a time of corporate bible reading, praying the Psalms, coming to the Lord in courtroom prayer, or teaching. There was a time of one-on-one with Shawna, to process our time here at the school; and times of creative processing at the beach or just outdoors. And we got to participate in base rhythms, spending time with the DTS folk over mealtimes, fellowshipping with one another, doing practical helps like simple chores. I also really enjoyed the weekends, which was our free time; spending a Saturday in a small town with a fellow classmate and Sunday at the Lighthouse Church in Troon. And I loved my classmates!! It was a small school, and there were just 5 of us, but each has such an amazing testimony of how the Lord has worked in their lives; and have such treasure within. The oldest was 73, the youngest is in her 20s. I was the only one from Asia! The diversity was beautiful!

All in, was so glad to have taken the plunge. Now, to make sure to continue to work out my faith in fear and trembling, and to order my life with some of these spiritual rhythms incorporated into part of the daily routine :)

The call of God

"God calls me. In a deeper sense than any other species of earthbound creature, I am called. And in a deeper sense I am free, for I can ignore the call. I can turn a deaf ear. I can say that no call came. I can deny that God called or even that God exists. What an amazing grace -- that the One who made me allows me to deny His existence! God created me with the power to disobey, for the freedom to obey would be nothing at all without the corresponding freedom to disobey. I can answer no, or I can answer yes. My fulfillment as a human being depends on my answer, for it is a loving Lord who calls me through the world's fog to His island of peace. If I trust Him, I will obey Him gladly." (Elizabeth Elliot, Discipline: The Glad Surrender)

All of us are called.  First: to acknowledge that without Jesus, we are lost.  And to therefore receive His invitation to be Lord and Saviour of our lives. Second, to acknowledge that being saved, He has a purpose and destiny for our lives, if we would yield to His call on us.

How will you respond today? 

What is your core? Knowing how God wired you.

Cornerstone Community Church's Pastor Yang Tuck Yoong preached a sermon on "Find out what is your core" in 2017, and I was reminded of this sermon recently. It is a really important sermon on finding out how God has wired each and everyone of us, so we can lead a focused life. There are commands God gives to all of us -- to love God, to love our neighbour, to preach the gospel to every creature etc.  But there are also specific callings he gives to each of us to steward, and gifts that accompany that calling. In my 20s, I was in a bigger church which had many ministry opportunities in which to serve. Because I knew myself so little, I thought the ministry of hearing impaired and learning to sign was so cool -- joined that ministry, then realised I had no aptitude for learning the sign language. Thought the puppetry ministry was really cool -- joined it, but lacked the arm strength to keep my puppet up behind the curtain throughout the duration of the entire evangelistic skit. Helped put together a centennial book to commemorate the church's history - and saw that through using my secular training ... that was cool too, but didn't exactly set my heart ablaze.  So throughout a span of 10 years, I was perhaps in and out of 7 to 8 ministries, trying to find myself.

Finally, one day, I happened to read Jim Cymbala's "Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire", an autobiography of how he was handed over the reins of pastoring the Brooklyn Tabernacle Church. It was a terrible challenge, pastoring this church in the heart of a drug-infested neighbourhood. But God showed him that if he would build the church on prayer, God would do the rest. After I finished reading the book, it so inspired me, that I cold-called the prayer ministry leader and asked if I could join them in prayer. Now prayer was the last ministry I would have joined -- it was not how I thought God had wired me. But after a few weeks in that ministry, I knew that I had found my HOME. And 20 years on, it's still the place I know God has called me to.

That's why I'm so big on people knowing who they are in Christ, and where God has called them. If everyone in the body of Christ is in their placement, serving one another, it would be as God intended.

Ps Yang gives important clues to find out how God has wired each of us -- and I've spent time over the years praying to God about the answers to these questions. They include:

1. What are your life verses?
2. What are your life books?
3. What frustrates you?
4. What are your core competencies?
5. What is your secular training like?
6. What Bible character do you most resemble? (This is a question especially for Holy Spirit to reveal)

I've also thrown in for good measure as I think about these things: What are your life movies?  What is your heart country.

Recently, I spent two weeks in YWAM Scotland, and on the second day, discovered a library there to my joy and delight. There were perhaps a few hundred Christian books in the library and I thought to pick one out to read during my stay there. I ended up picking out "The Nations Called" by Pieter Bos, a book on the calling and destiny of nations.  Reading the book, there were many moments when I had to stop and pause, because it felt like I was drinking from a well.

On my second last day there, at a dinner, I sat next to an elderly missionary and we spent some time finding out about each other - our lives, our passion points etc. She asked about my passion points, and I told her that my heart was for the revival of nations, and for nations to come into their destiny. She then said, "Oh! Then you must read Pieter Bos' The Nations Called". I was so excited, because it was an affirmation of the book I had picked out!

As one gets older, God brings us to a place of convergence - where our training, our passion, our skills and gifts come together for us to serve Him and to advance the kingdom of God in a unique way. Take some time to pray about how God made you and go on and serve him as only you can do.

Government of Self

A prayer to pray:

Will you are a good servant but a poor master. I command you to bow down now before God and submit to my spirit. Come and take your rightful place.

Mind you are a good servant but a poor master. I command you to bow down now before God and submit to my spirit. Come and take your rightful place. It's not all down to you!

Emotions you are a good servant but a poor master. I command you to bow down now before God and submit to my spirit. Come and take your rightful place. I acknowledge that you are real but you may not always be based on truth. The best place for you to be is in submission to my spirit and being parented by myself. Come and take your rightful place.

Body you are a good servant but a poor master. I command you to bow down now before God and submit to my spirit. Come and take your rightful place.

Spirit I call you to attention. I command you to rise up and be in government over myself. Come and take your rightful place.

Solemn Assemblies (Day 6/40)

Friday. Stepped into church half an hour after the prayer meeting started, and it was FULL. I mouthed the word to the usher who was trying to find me a seat, "Full?" Incredible stuff. When the house of the Lord is packed to the gills not because a well-known speaker is preaching but because a solemn assembly has been called, would God not move?

Yet, tonight, the theme of prayer was a sombre one: abortion. Singapore has one of the most liberal abortion laws in the world, being just one of seven countries permitting elective abortion after 20 weeks (ours is 24 weeks; the other nations are US, Canada, China, Netherlands, North Korea, Vietnam). The issues are not easy: and our laws permit the abortion of a baby at 6 months to provide options to mothers of babies with deformity or abnormality.  Compassion. Love. Grace. Yet, God is also very clear in His word about the sanctity of all human life.  We prayed for mothers and fathers to have a change in heart, to love their own, to feel they have options. And also, for more to rise up to be willing to be a fosterer, to be willing to take care of children not their own.

In the scene in Lord of the Rings, Gandalf confronts a monstrous being that seeks to cross an old bridge with the words "YOU SHALL NOT PASS."

As watchmen over Singapore, will we likewise say to the spirit of abortion, that in our land, "you shall not pass."

Solemn Assemblies (Day 5/40)

This evening's meeting was focused on praying for the young people, the next generation. And oh wow, there was such a mighty presence of God in the room, a knocking on heaven's door, a cry to the Father to reprise the Holy Spirit revival that started from ACS in the 1970s. Do it again, Lord!! We prayed for the teachers in our land, who wield such an influence in young lives. The young prayed for the fathers and mothers in the land, who likewise prayed for the young people to surpass our generation. It was just such a wonderful time in the Lord. And the auditorium was full on a Thursday evening (a work day) with cries rising up to heaven, and impassioned pleas to the Lord. I think tonight, I caught a glimpse of what can happen when the saints in the land carry a burden in their hearts as one, and in one accord, knock on the doors of heaven. Send rain, send revival, Lord!!

Solemn Assemblies: Day 3/40

Day 3/40: A night of recognising the holiness of God, a night of consecration. Such a strong presence of the Lord in the house... also a reverence before a holy God. Praying O Lord that we will shed every weight and sin that entangles. And that with one heart, we will continue to stand with each other to pray for Singapore to be a dwelling place for the Lord. 37 more days to go of this 40-day solemn assemblies: come!